The first time I met Jay was in 1994 when my BFF stole his hat and ran around the high school courtyard refusing to give it back. Back then he was known as “Jono” (it’s a looong story)! I was definitely uninterested considering he was in the year below. Nothing much came out of that schoolyard encounter (for me or Grace ). Almost 2 years passed before I gave him another thought. Suddenly I noticed that he was hot! He played American football, basketball and volleyball; I was on the girls’ basketball and volleyball teams and we’d often have practise on the same days. It was a great opportunity to sneak peeks! I wasn’t at all fazed by the fact that he was dating (if you can call not talking to each other at school or hanging out, dating) my younger cousin Denae. I dropped a few hints to my loud mouth friends Nath & Grant, and before you know it, he was single!
The day before ANZAC day public holiday, I caught him coming back from the tuck-shop, cornjack in mouth, and asked him to a party at Tam’s house that night (much to Lindy’s disgust).
He rocked up to the party dressed like a rapper – baggy jeans, oversized hoodie, white sneakers. He loved hip-hop and RnB. I dressed in vintage clothes and listened to Smashing Pumpkins, Sheryl Crowe & Nirvana (this was 1996!). People couldn’t believe we were dating; I was in year 12 and he was in year 11. The other guys in my year started a (not-so-)secret betting ring to place guesses on how long we’d last… I must admit it took a while for him to get up enough courage to hold my hand and actually talk to me at school, but it was kinda cute how shy he actually was!
We made it through high-school, me going to Uni for a year and then moving into our own place together in Sydney. We had a few rough patches where breaking up would have been the easier option, but our love proved stronger than either of us expected. I’ve learnt that communication really is key. I trust him 100%. I know that he always has my back. He is my best friend. He is my calm.
We married in 2005, on a beach in the Whitsundays with 40 of our closest friends and family watching on. We wrote our own vows and he just astounded me with his depth of genuine love and devotion. All I felt that day was an overwhelming love, trust and happiness with the man who I promised to spend the rest of my life with.
Our tastes in life complement each other, but we also allow each other to develop and explore as our own person. We have the best times together travelling (we’ve travelled throughout Europe, Asia, NZ & Oz). We love to go on long walks around the harbour with our doggie Harley, we are total foodies and love discovering new and exciting cuisines and restaurants, we both play music, and love nothing better than going on impromptu road trips or curling up on the couch watching the footy or our fave TV shows and movies. I genuinely love his friends and he feels the same about mine.
What I love about him is that he’s strong, secure and an easy going. I am regularly confounded by his intelligence; he just gets things. Whatever it is he can pick it up and figure out how it works. But most importantly, he gets me. He doesn’t mind that I get freaked out by Stick insects, or that I obsessively clean things, or that I spend way too much on candles and fresh cut flowers. He loves that I make up crazy dances when I’m overtired or stressed, that I’ll disappear for a few days when I’m engrossed in a book and he puts up with my favourite food fetishes where I’ll cook food with a common theme for a month before moving onto something else (oranges in everything one month, couscous every day the next). He’s unbelievably patient while I have the shortest fuse, and he takes the time to explain things so I can understand the coolest stuff about Physics or technology. He’s relaxed, honest and humble.
We’ve been together for fourteen and a half years but I’m still learning new things about him. I’m so proud of who he is as a man and how our relationship has developed.
I never want to take what we have for granted. I want to always be someone that he can be proud to be married too, because that’s how I feel about him.
We’re true soul mates.